I'm way past that, none of those steps have ever worked... but thank you. The phone says it has connected, but it doesnt. 

I've reinstalled my USB ports from device manager, downloaded Samsung software, and erased the phone several times so I know its not something I installed.

My main question was just to find out if this is happened to anyone else. A guy at work with a Captivate has the same problem. We just cant get them to mount as drives on any computer. There is comfort in numbers, I guess.